Have you ever noticed that the rich mainly surround themselves with other rich people? It’s not just the rich that surround themselves with their own kind, it’s every socioeconomic class around the globe. The rich get richer and the poor get poorer, right? Why is that? It is because who you surround yourself with matters; it heavily influences how you think and largely impacts who you become.
Who you have always been around may not be who you need to stay around
Look, I get it – this is a hard pill to swallow; however, the people you have always hung out with may not be the people you need to continue to surround yourself with. We get it so twisted, believing just because we have known someone for a long time, and in some cases, our entire life, that we are somehow indebted and bound to them.
Understand that being loyal (by any means necessary) to someone just because of the length of time you have known that person also means taking the risk of being loyal to the same mindset that has done nothing to move you forward in your life. If you aren’t where you desire to be in your life, what sense does it make to continue to hang around the same people that operate from a mindset that has proven to result in living life on the same level?
Could it be that we are habitual by nature and over the course of our lives we are conditioned to recreate the same patterns in life as those we were exposed to growing up? Is it possible that we are not able to recognize when we are living life on repeat? I can only speak from my own personal experience and will say this:
Loyalty to low-level thinking will keep you on the lower level of life
Why are so many people loyal to what doesn’t serve to make them better? Admittedly, it is very hard to cut ties with friends and even more difficult when it involves a family member, but it is necessary if being around those people is doing nothing more than holding you back.
Stop being loyal to low-level thinking people
I have a confession to make: I am a people watcher. That’s right, I pay attention to people and what I have noticed is there is a couple of reasons people stay stuck in the spaces of life they no longer wish to exist in and both reasons stem from ignorance. Now before you go getting your panties (or boxers) in a bunch, let me explain what I mean: They simply don’t know what they don’t know.
Most “stuck” people haven’t been introduced to a different way of thinking, which, in today’s society, seems almost impossible seeing as though we live in the age of information. The second reason is that some people simply refuse to do anything different, even after being exposed to new information that will inevitably assist with changing unproductive thought patterns. This level of change requires letting some people go.
If your reasons for not making a better life for yourself is the latter, newsflash: This is also when you start giving yourself excuses as to why you can’t do so (we have been friends forever, they are family, it’s too hard, I’m too old, I’m too young, I’m not smart enough, I don’t have enough money).
I know because I used to be that person, but once I realized I was the only one standing in my own way, it was life-changing. When I started searching for new information and gained new knowledge, my mind expanded. I made the decision to change the way I was thinking.
Change your thoughts to change your life
Nine out of ten times when you change the way you think, you will lose some people in your life, especially if they are not willing to grow with you. The amazing thing about learning and growing to change is once you gain new knowledge, your mind will never again return to its previous state. When this happens, your thoughts will govern your actions.
If you ever get to the point of changing your mind, elevating your thoughts you will undoubtedly understand the only way to go to the next level may also require you to change your circle of people.
This part right here is what most people don’t like. What if those people are friends you have known since childhood? Naturally, there is a bond there, but let’s think about it like this: when you get to a point in your life where you want more and are willing to do whatever it takes to have more, you must change who you are. To become a different person, you must be willing to sacrifice something.
Personal growth equals some level of metamorphosis, which will no doubt, require you to surround yourself with the right kind of people. When you change the way you think, this will create distance between you and those you have always been around, unless, they are also willing to develop and grow with you. This is the best-case scenario, but if I can keep it one hundred, most times, this will not be the case. Most people avoid change because it’s uncomfortable. I’m going to say this one more time: sometimes, who you have always been around may not be who you need to stay around.
Get right or get left
When it’s time to grow, those same people – you know the ones you are so familiar and comfortable with, need to get right or get left. Period. Point Blank. This may be disappointing and hard to accept; however, the good news is when you get sick and tired of being sick and tired of your current situation and decide to improve your life, everything changes for the better. Once you get to this point, saying “No” to nonsense becomes easy. You won’t have time for it (seriously). When you are determined to change your life on any level, your focus changes; one of them being other people that are not trying to go in the same direction as you.
Right thoughts attract the right people
Like anything in life, there’s a sort of snowball effect that occurs when you change what you focus on – things begin to shift in your world. If you have a negative outlook on life and continue to hang around negative people, in turn, you will attract negative energy and create even more negative circumstances in your life. Continuously thinking negative thoughts is self-sabotaging.
Change your outlook and everything will change for the better
On the flip side of the coin, thinking the right thoughts will always attract the right people into your life, resulting in you living your best life. You will know when you have surrounded yourself with the right people because they will only want to see you win. The right people will have the same “in it to win it” mindset that you have.
Having the right mindset will repel those with the wrong or opposite mindset from yours. These people will have no desire to be around you and may become your biggest haters and that’s ok because the feeling will be mutual. It is impossible for them to understand your dream or see your vision because your interests and aspirations are on different levels.
The right people for you
Believe it or not, the right people will be introduced to you as a result of changing your focus. Changing the way in which you once thought forces you to embark on new experiences, go to new places and be in new environments. Changing your mindset will draw the right people to you, seemingly out of thin air. Changing the places you go to and the things you do will open an entirely new world to you. It will be like a breath of fresh air to be around positive, mentally motivated, emotionally stable individuals that have a plan and a purpose.
Being surrounded by people who are where you want to be is pure motivation for you to rise to new levels. You’ll know when you have found the right people (or maybe they will find you) because you will push one another forward and to new levels in life. You will have a strong desire to become more and do better in every area of your life.
Sometimes it can be tricky when you meet new people because it may seem like they are good for you and will help you to become better, however, there are times after a while when you aren’t doing as well as you once were – it may even seem like you are moving backward. If this is the case, they are simply not the right people. At the end of the day, the right people for your life will always be forward-moving.
Sherre Webb Life Coaching is here to help you live a purpose-filled life, free from judgment and fear. If you would like to schedule a one-on-one coaching session, click Book Appointment to schedule your free initial appointment.
As always, I would love to hear your thoughts. Leave a comment below to share.