I used to care. I used to care so much that at one point I was willing to compromise being true to myself just to please other people. I cared so much about what other people thought because I yearned for acceptance and validation; but let me tell you something: if you don’t love yourself and all of your magical flaws, it won’t matter what you supposedly change or compromise to please someone else…at the end of the day, you will be sorely disappointed that the people you bent over backward for won’t even care, recognize, or respect you any more than the level at which you do these things for yourself. It’s just the way it goes.
In order to do and become all that I wished to be, I had to develop somewhat of a tunnel vision. I could no longer care what other people thought about me or what they were doing and if you want to become all that you were created to be, you can’t care either.
Set Some Real Goals
A real goal is something that scares and excites you at the same time. Real goals are never easy to obtain. The results of a real goal are not handed out and they require an enormous amount of work to reach them. Once you have real goals, your focus changes and you start to see things and people in a much larger vision. People that have real goals believe that if something or someone in their life isn’t pushing them forward and challenging them to become better in every sense of the word, then those things and people can only be holding them back, bringing them down, or keeping them stuck. Achieving a real goal will change you during and as a result of the process.
Let Me Say This One More Time
Anytime you want to turn your dream into reality, especially if it is one that seems a bit ridiculous or far-fetched to the average person, you can’t care what other people think. You can longer care about how you may look to the outside world. You also can’t care about what other people have going on in their lives or what they think you should have going on in yours. The people that run this marathon called life and actually win simply don’t have time to care about what others think of them and they certainly don’t have time to try and figure out all the grimy details of other people’s life.
The moment you start to give your attention to what other people think and say or how they may view you is the moment you start to lose. You have got things to do, business to tend to, and places to go if you really want to succeed. I’m going to say this one more time as nice as I possibly can: You ain’t got time to care! Get your priorities straight, get focused, and get busy.
Placing more value on what someone else may or may not have going on in their life will undoubtedly start the process of comparing your life to theirs. It’s a very toxic way to live because either way, you are focused on any and everything besides yourself and what it is that you need to be doing to become all that you are supposed to be in order to achieve your goals and make a difference in this world. If this is the case, you probably need to take some time to figure out what impact you are supposed to make on this world and the people in it and get you some new goals that will drive you to pursue them. Caring about the way someone else’s life “appears to be” is nothing more than a distraction. Distractions are dream killers especially when you allow them to consume you. Some people can be dream killers when they are unhappy in their own life. You know the saying “Misery loves company”.
The Relentless Pursuit of a Dream
Do you have dreams you want to turn into reality? I know I do and I have for years but I have also been guilty of allowing people to influence my thought process which, inadvertently, affected my belief in my dreams and myself. This can only happen when a person doesn’t know or realize who they are or the greatness they hold inside. My own negative thoughts, lack of confidence in myself, and all kinds of distractions were the cause of me wasting so much time. Whatever you allow on a day to day, what you think and do, good or bad will affect your future so if things aren’t the way you wish them to be in your life, take a good, long look in the mirror and start making the necessary changes that will catapult you to where you want to be in your life. Change the way you think and you will change your life. Don’t get discouraged when things aren’t changing as quickly as you would like for them to. No one gets in the position of not living their best life overnight so it only makes sense that your circumstances won’t change overnight but with laser-like focus and determination, anyone can achieve anything they set their mind to. Like I said before, I have been guilty of allowing myself to be distracted by being more concerned about what people may think instead of placing more emphasis on and going after what I really wanted in my life. I swear it boiled down to the simple fact that at the time, my way of thinking was counterproductive to achieving the success I actually desired to have in my life because I simply didn’t believe in myself. I know there are so many people out there that suffer from a lack of confidence along with a lack of belief in their own abilities so they just accept living an average life. This does not have to be the case! Just make up your mind that you are going to go after what you want and get busy doing just that.
People are very good at pretending. A lot of people do this so well that they trick themselves into believing their own lies. They post pictures on social media that display a picture-perfect life or say things that sound like they have it all together and are winning in the biggest way in life. Rarely do you see those who are authentic in every sense of the word? We see what they want us to see and I can almost guarantee you, it ain’t the good, the bad, and the ugly. It’s more like the good, the great, and the greatest. These types of people are more concerned about what other people think and they may not even be consciously aware that they are operating in this state of mind. I think social media is a great way to connect with other people and, like so many people do now, use it as a tool to promote, advertise, and grow a business; however, it can also be a two-edged sword if we allow ourselves to get caught up in the details of other people’s lives, along with all the other negativity that can constantly bombard your timeline – things that do absolutely nothing to promote your own growth and success. If you really have goals that you want to accomplish and are working on becoming better, you simply won’t have time to get caught up in the hype.
Until a person finds their passion in life, they won’t have anything that drives them to become massively successful and be the best they can be. Unless you find your niche, you may be that person that is constantly distracted by the cares of this world. I had to realize that until I learned to turn off the outside noise of the world and not care about people’s opinions, I would always feel unfulfilled like something was missing; and there was something missing: my purpose. Begin to care more about finding and fulfilling your purpose, and stop caring about what other people think because the simple truth is you can’t afford to care.
Sherre Webb Life Coaching is here to help you live a purpose-filled life, free from judgment and fear. If you would like to schedule a one-on-one coaching session, click Book Appointment to schedule your free initial appointment.
5 thoughts on “You Can’t Care”
Wow! I just came across your blog today. You are a great writer. Love this content. I’ll be regular now. Congrats!
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Thank you so much LaShawn. I appreciate your support.